Only you and me.
We drift above and under each passing wave,
with a slow and beautiful repetition, like we both
were supposed to be here all along.
Once I was a child, counting clouds in the sky.
There was nothing but the ocean,
and my body existing in that space.
Nothing but a world full of possibilities,
and a big, open future to come.
But here, now, there is so much more.
I keep thinking that since there is only the sound of my heartbeat,
Then I might hear yours too, beating softly within me.
I close my eyes and try to imagine you there,
Thinking about who you will be in this world.
Who I will become too.
I wonder that as I grow bigger and continue to float,
will the weightlessness that we both feel,
connect us even more so or will I have to wait
till I meet you in my arms.
16/1/14 1.15pm

I can’t even remember the last time I spent three full days on a beach doing absolutely nothing. I mean literally getting up, finding my position for the day and settling in. Moving to go sit in a hammock, maybe have some lunch on the beach and then back to the highest state of comfortable pleasure. Gawd, was it really as long as ago as my big trip overseas over 8 years ago…..yikes, it was.

I mean yes, I’ve gone to tropical destinations since then, but in between lazy beach sessions, I’ve been 4WD or hiking up mountains, going on fishing expeditions, sky diving or some crazy adventure. But in Phu Quoc, Vietnam, at the remote and beautiful Peppercorn Resort (highly recommend-have to head down a bumpy, dirt road for 15 mins to get there but well worth it), we enjoyed the middle part of our honeymoon. We completely relaxed and surrendered to the serenity. The first day we did an 8 hour island tour, visiting a pepper farm, fish sauce factory, temples, a jail, beautiful coastlines & waterfalls-all of this was amazing.

But what we really yearned for was a time to switch off our phone, cut off from facebook, emails & the internet. A complete movement away from our hectic lifestyles back in Melbourne. I definitely know I don’t have nearly enough days where I do nothing but read and listen to music. There is always some pull to do something, be somewhere or at home, the never ending chores that daily life entails.

But as I looked out to the blue ocean unraveling before me- I was brought back to how completely at one I feel when I’m near water, especially the beach. The gentle breeze in my hair, watching the fishing boats in the distance. I am lost to the elements, I am free from thought. I spent a long time just floating in the water, a feeling that always brings me back to when I was a child. Complete surrender, only my heartbeat, as I would watch fluffy clouds float past in the sky. No thoughts or fear in that moment, just a purity that water gives me, cleansing me like a baptism. If only you could bottle the calmness of these moments. Instead, I yearn to find ways to recreate this at home. Swim more, breathe deeply in yoga, sit outside in a park and do read and listen to music, watching the world go by. I may not have the beach on an island every day, but there are ways of creating my own little island when I need to.